What comes with opening up.
Life has a strange way of handing us the support we need, often when we least expect it. Whether it's through art, parenting, or just opening up to those around us, sometimes sharing our deepest struggles leads to the most surprising, practical help. Recently, I had a personal experience that reminded me of just how powerful vulnerability can be in shaping how we create, express ourselves, and care for others.
Before moving to the United States, I met up with a close friend, someone I’ve always felt a connection with. Despite not spending a lot of time together, I just felt she was just special. During this meeting, I found myself opening up about something I rarely talk about—my past struggles with suicidal thoughts. It was a heavy topic, but I felt safe with her. She listened, without offering advice or solutions, which was exactly what I needed at that moment.
But what happened next was unexpected. As I was about to leave, she handed me a pack of chili candy—yes, you read that right, chili candy! She explained that when intense emotional states like suicidal thoughts arise, one way to break the cycle is through discomfort. The heat from the spicy candy forces the brain to focus on the physical sensation, grounding you in the moment and away from emotional pain. It made sense in an unusual way, a method known as sensory grounding, which brings you back into your body and the present moment by redirecting your focus. (I read later on;))
What struck me most wasn’t just the quirky suggestion but how practical and thoughtful it was. Sometimes support doesn’t come in the form of deep conversations or emotional breakthroughs. Instead, it might appear as a small, strange gesture—like a pack of spicy candy—that provides just the right tool for coping in difficult moments.
A few days after that meeting, she sent me a voice message, apologizing for not helping more. But the truth is, she had already done more than enough. By simply listening and offering that unexpected tool, she gave me exactly what I needed—something tangible, something I could use when those feelings return.
This experience made me reflect on how being open, even in small ways, can affect both art and parenthood. As artists, we often feel isolated, stuck in our own heads with self-doubt, emotional blocks, or even mental health struggles. Opening up, even just a little, invites support into our lives that can unlock new ways of thinking and creating. It’s a reminder that we don’t have to carry the burden alone.
The same applies to parenting. We’re often expected to have everything together, always calm and in control. But showing vulnerability, even to our children, teaches them that it’s okay to ask for help, to have emotions, and to find healthy ways of coping. I’ve cried in front of my son before, and though I sometimes worry about how that affects him, I realize that by showing him my sadness, I’m teaching him that people have emotions, that it’s normal to feel down, and that it’s okay to seek comfort.
This whole experience has reminded me that whether we’re creating art, raising our kids, or just navigating life, sometimes the smallest, most unexpected moments offer the greatest support. Being open and vulnerable can be a powerful tool—not just for ourselves, but for the people who care about us.
Have you ever had a moment where opening up brought you unexpected support?
